Schizophrenia

Schizophrenia (pronounced /ˌskɪtsəˈfrɛniə/ or /ˌskɪtsəˈfriːniə/), from the Greek roots schizein (σχίζειν, "to split") and phrēn, phren- (φρήν, φρεν-, "mind") is a psychiatric diagnosis that describes a mental disorder characterized by abnormalities in the perception or expression of reality.

Anyone associated with the Stock Market,Banking Industry or Real Estate are totally freaking out right now. They have finally realized that Barack Obama really does intend to pull the curtain completely back and reveal just how shady most of the financial sector has become. Not so long ago, say 20 years, you had a small number of unscrupulous investors that would screw anyone for the money (the Gordon Gecko model). But thier damage was well offset by the relative sanity and conservative nature of the banking industry and the fact that they were always fucking each other over for the same pile of money.

But in 1999 large portions of the Glass-Stegall act were repealed in a move spearheaded by then Senator Phil Gramm. This made direct competition between banks, insurance companies and securities firms possible. This allowed previously risk adverse companies like large banks (Citibank, Bank Of America) and Insurance companies (AIG) to use their huge piles of well protected capital to dabble in securities trading and hedge funds. These insititutions fueled massive gaines for securities trading giants like Lehman Brothers and Bear Stearns that were more than happy to "create" special securities for the previously risk-adverse insitutions. These CDOs appeared to be low risk which the bankers liked because they really shouldn't have been leveraging their capital as much as they were but the money was just so good....and everyone else was doing it. Besides Congress had already given their blessing by passing the Commodity Futures Modernization Act that basically said to the market that we trust your judgment on these matters and don't think you should be bothered by something as annoying as Government oversight. It's not like the whole will collapse under its insanely over-valued weight and we'll have to spend trillions sorting the mess out.

So who do you blame? Congress for passing legislation that turned loose a bunch of money crazed lunatics allowing them to run their own asylum into the ground? How about Bill Clinton, he signed the legislation into law that kick started this whole nightmare. What about Alan Greenspan? He slashed and burned interest rates to insanely low levels which allowed lenders to give loans to anyone with a hearbeat. How about everyone's villian George W. Bush? He wasted the relative prosperity left by his predecessor on two foreign wars which have netted us absolutely nothing except a black eye in the international community and a mountain of debt. What about you? You've probably lived beyond your means for the last ten years you ultra consumerist prick. Your wasteful spending is hardly the paragon of fiscal responsibility.

I say we go back to something familiar that reminds us of when we were young and didn't worry about money. Let's blame the Russians! Bring back the Cold War, living under the threat of nuclear annihilation will really put this whole finacial crisis into perspective.