Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Make it stop

That keyboard player kicks ass.

Its The Final Countdown - Watch more Funny Videos

Huge waste of money

Today will forever be known on the Internet as the day the illegal music died. The Pirate Bay will soon cease to be in it's current wareztastic form. I feel the most sorry for the company that has bought TPB thinking they can turn that huge volume of illegal traffic into some kind of legitimate enterprise. Sorry guys but once a pirate, always a pirate....the users will just go elsewhere and someone will step in to fill the content void.

Remember, the RIAA heralded the end of Napster as a great victory over Internet piracy. That worked out well for them.

Baby steps

US combat troops have officially withdrawn from major Iraqi cities...2294 days after invading. That's nearly two and a half years longer than our own Civil War lasted (1458 days) and 101 days longer than the hostilities of World War II. That's just shocking to me.

Hopefully Iraq will become a peaceful, Democratic country and end up better for the whole nightmare. If not, I doubt that history will look too kindly on the actions of the Bush Administration in particular and America in general.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Speaking of propaganda.

Here's a great story about how some teachers accidentally showed their kindergarten aged students some hard core porn.

  1. Who leaves their porn in the DVD player? That's a fucking rookie mistake.
  2. Don't these kids watch enough of these shitty musical travesties at home with their absentee parents? DO SOME MATH for fuck's sake!
Too bad there's no Jonas Brothers bukake/bondage/snuff film that the kids could watch....end that trend once and for all.

A laugh a minute

Ever wonder why your Grandparents are like they are? Here you go...these are awesome.

Are you popular?

How to be well groomed.

Moral Maturity....LOL.


Good luck!

Bernie Madoff is on his way to prison for 150 years for stealing money from thousands of investors. The 150 year sentence is effectively a life sentence which is unfortunate, by that I mean It's unfortunate that he will only live to serve a mere pittance of that sentence and certainly not enough to befit the level of scum that he is.

I know that he'll end up in some Connecticut Daycare for white collar criminals but I can always hope that just maybe he might get transferred to some Federal "pound me in the ass" Prison. Bernie, my advice is either kick someone's ass the first day or become someone's bitch.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Hummer FAIL.

The Chinese Government is blocking the sale of Hummer to a Chinese company based on environmental concerns. Now that's the biggest load of shit I've heard this week. Is this the same government that allows the import of millions of tons of e-waste to be brought into China for "recycling"? I'd love to know the real reason why they are shutting this deal down.

An Internet classic.

If you haven't seen the original versions of this then you should just give your computer to someone that cares. Hitler as become aware of the fact that he is an Internet Meme.

EMBED-Adolf Hitler Is A Meme - Watch more free videos


Great excuse

Ready? Today on his propaganda broadcast radio show, Rush Limbaugh blamed the affair of disgraced South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford on Barack Obama...seriously. Limbaugh purports that Sanford ran into the arms of a woman in another country because Obama is destroying America.

Even if it is tongue and cheek humor it's still sad. Just admit to the fact that most of the GOP is full of shit.

The Fail Whale wails for thee.

Celebrities always die in threes, at least that's the old wives tale. First Ed McMahon and then Farrah Fawcett followed quickly by Michael Jackson. Jackson's passing appears to have caused the kind of shock rarely felt by a celebrity death. Not to belittle the passing of the other two people but it was Jackson's passing that caused traffic related outages across the Internet. When you can crush Google's servers then you know you've got some global reach.

I have a feeling that he's going to end up like Elvis and Tupac. Soon there will be MJ sightings in Winn Dixies all across the South.

RIP, Michael Jackson.


I've seen so many great trailers recently that I decided I put together a list of movies yet to come this year that I am excited about.

Daybreakers - Cool looking vampire movie with Ethan Hawke.
HP: Half Blood Prince - Been waiting since last November....
Zombieland - Blogged about it the other day, looks funny as hell.
Pandorum - If it's as creepy as Event Horizon then I'm in.
Surrogates - Interesting premise, can Bruce Willis still pull off an action role?
The Road - Viggo can do no wrong...except Hidalgo.
District 9 - When was the last time a Peter Jackson project sucked?
9 - It just looks really different, like Little Big Planet the movie.
Inglourious Basterds - Tarantino, Brad Pitt and Nazis....sweet.
Avatar - James Cameron has been working on this movie for almost 10 years...Recently there have been some press screenings where people may have actually shat themselves. There isn't even a teaser trailer out yet....which is odd.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

You should watch this

Revision3 as a new show about film editing that is very cool. They show you how to pull off some very professional looking effects in fairly easy (though time consuming) ways.

But the real reason to watch is that the sample skits they produce are seriously funny. This bit nearly killed me it's so good.

Now that is some funny shit.

Check out this hilarious clip of Conan O'Brien going to random people's houses from Craigslist. He's shopping for guitars and decides to bring along an expert guitar adviser.

Can you imagine either one of them showing up at your door? Let alone both.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Get out your wallet

I have always loved tools both high tech and low. Today I have found the mother lode of seriously cool tools of all shapes, sizes and uses. County Comm makes all kinds of really cool equipment for Government and Police agencies. I know a couple of you out there are going to spend as much time as I did (hours) pouring over some of the crazy stuff they have.

Where's my damn credit card?

Turning point?

Is the Volt really GM's K car? Can it save the ailing company or is it too little too late? The first pre production test cars are rolling out of General Motors Integration plant which is the last step prior to full production. This means that the cars rolling out of that plant are basically the final revision of the car.

I want to believe that the Volt will be the first truley usable electric car but I still have nightmares about the Cadillac Cimmaron...talk about FAIL. I can't put my faith in Tesla as long as Elon Musk's crazy ass in charge of things even if the Model S is a thing to behold.

They all fall down...

Yet another disgraced Conservative Governor has admitted to having an extramarital affair. South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford admitted today that his mysterious Appalachian Hiking Trip was actually a tryst with his Argentine lover. How many more hits can the GOP take before even their base gets tired of their bullshit? Isn't the Republican Party supposed to be all about conservative family values? Oh wait....I forgot gay marriage killed the American family.

The downside

What's the downside to The First Amendment? Most people have more opinions than brains and can't take a fucking joke.

That's where you decided to take your stand? Dave Letterman making an erroneous off color joke about some crazy lady's kid? You take a pass on genocide in Darfur, corruption within the Government, the abuses of an authoritarian theocracy in Iran or the fact that for eight years the United States government tortured "enemy combatants" so that you can protest a COMEDIAN? Lucky for you I respect YOUR First Amendment right to assemble and protest, even if I consider you to be a total fucking idiot.

The Mirage

Things may be rough in Dubai these days with the collapse of the global economy and oil prices wildly fluctuating but work on the Burj Dubai is nearly complete. The tallest building in the world as reached it's final height, 2684 feet, and some crazy man has shot an amazing video from the very top.

Keep in mind that those surrounding buildings that the Burj dwarfs are *only* around 60-80 stories tall.

Even crazier than that is the following video shot by a French & British duo that of BASE jumpers. They bluffed their way onto the construction site and jumped off of the 160th floor of the building.

That puts things in perspective...

What could possibly go wrong?

How could this have gone wrong? It seemed like such a good idea.

FIREWORK NUTSHOT FAIL - Watch more Funny Videos

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Zombie Kill of The Week

Please don't suck, please don't suck, please don't suck. This looks awesome.

Hop in the musical wayback machine

Today's band from the depths of my playlist is Letters To Cleo.

I forgot how cute that lead singer was....and Jon Stewart was like ten years old.

Bulletin Board FTW

Now that is awesome.

That should buff out.

I'm sure the crane operator was issued a stern warning.

Click to watch video

More videos at

Monday, June 22, 2009

Cultural Sensitivity

Don't worry kid someday you'll be able to deny all their loan applications.....ZING!

Yet another Japanese WTF?

Seriously...are they lacing the water supply with LSD in Japan these days?

EMBED-Japan Makes Another Super Weird Video - Watch more free videos

The Video Seen Around the World

If you haven't seen the "Neda" video yet then you should think twice about watching it in the raw and unedited form. You are literally watching someone die and it is far more disturbing than most would care to admit. The video as been shown on TV continually for the last few days but I haven't seen the unedited version on mainstream news, always the blurred version. Needless to say...the unedited version is a completely different experience especially without the terribly overwrought "sadness" that most news anchors are so bad at portraying. There's a reason why they are news anchors not actors and in situations like this I wish they would just shut up because they do nothing but cheapen the significance of the event.

The implications of this murder are yet to be determined but given the importance of Martyrs within the culture she is sure to be remembered if not venerated. She may have been formally identified if this wiki entry is to be assumed true.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Has it really come to this?

Seriously? I weep for the future.

If you have become so insanely obese that you have to resort to utensils for personal hygiene then please, put down the Ben & Jerry's and go for a walk.

Suck it Haters!

I'm not proud of the fact that I've been sucked into the Apple marketing machine but I still love my iPhone like it's a member of my family. Now that OS3.0 has been released it's even better. Even though the changes appear minor the nagging issues that were eliminated have improved the experience a great deal.

I work in a corporate environment where I have to support lots of Blackberries and let me tell you something....they suck balls. You have to pay a damn fortune to run BES (the backend software that lets your BB talk to your email server) and your stuck with that horrible interface. Once you've used an iPhone, or a Palm Pre for that matter, going back to using a Blackberry is like using a stone tablet and chisel. The iPhone also works seemlessly with OWA/OMA which is included with Microsoft's Exchange server. That means you're not paying a fortune for BES (yes, I am aware that I am oversimplifing that but it is accurate) just to get your Exchange email. Couple that with a $99 iPhone 3G and I think you'll start seeing much more businesses using iPhones instead of BBs.

Given that, I will NOT be lining up and shelling out a fortune (deez nuts, AT&T) to buy a "new" iPhone 3GS. Sorry Apple but you have seriously failed to impress with this round of hardware "advances". In my personal experience when Apple pulls up short on a product it means that the next product is the one that you will REALLY want to have.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Wednesday, June 17, 2009


There are drawbacks to having a 25,000 track music library. Creating play lists is a massive pain in the ass and shuffling your entire collection is not practical for most situations. As a result you end up "loosing" music in your massive collection for long periods of time. There are no more physical CD cases on a shelf to remind you of the fact that have an album....it's kind of sad.

Of course every once in a while that great library is shuffling you come across a piece of music that just hits you by surprise. Today mine dredged up The Grave Dancers Union by Soul Asylum which I probably haven't really listened to in ten years. I forgot wait it was like to listen to an entire album of music that I really enjoyed....

Great Idea

The government of Germany is seriously entertaining the idea of filtering the Internet nationwide. If they proceed Germany would become the first "western" nation to take such radical measures. No one in their right mind would support child pornography but instituting a nation wide internet filtering policy just to prevent that one illicit activity seems overly zealous to me. Also, if child pornography is this big of a problem in Germany they may want to think about a different solution.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009



This is pretty funny shit.

WTF! You prick!

Brett Favre, indecisive motherfucker, is trying to figure out if he wants to play football again.

WTF BRETT!! Buy a fucking boat, drink some beer, catch some damn fish....don't you have enough money? Don't give me this "love the game" bullshit. Football is a brutal sport and you're lucky to have survived it intact enough to enjoy the rest of your life.


Abercrombie gets Stumped

Check out this story of a one armed girl that was "banished" to the stockroom at Abercrombie because she didn't meet the standards of "the look". She looks pretty cute in the picture, way hotter than the A-cup, chuck-a-lunch sorostitutes that work at most A&F stores.

I like to go into Abercrombie (which hasn't sold clothes that can fit me since 1996) and eat a nice meatball sub while browsing for clothes. It really pisses off those little rat children they have working there.

Bring back quirky

Saab has been sold to Swedish boutique supercar maker Koenigsegg. First off, if you don't know who Koenigsegg is then watch the video below. Second of all, let's hope that they can return some of that quirky Swedishness back into Saab products.

Bite the hand

Preface: I've always liked Bill Maher, even when I didn't agree with him, and I believe that Religulous should be REQUIRED viewing for everyone.

Bill Maher has decided that what Barack Obama needs is some more criticism. I do agree that Obama appears to be more than comfortable in the public limelight but I have to disagree that, has Maher contests, it is all his fault. The man lives in a fish bowl, he is the most watched person on the planet on most days and our media is OBSESSED with him. He's also fighting the closed door, "man behind the curtain" bullshit that we had to live with for the last eight years.

Don't get me wrong, Bill Maher has a point and the lack of this kind of criticism of Bush's early terms helped contribute to his Administration's ultimate failure. I just think that Maher likes to draw attention to HIMSELF, nothing like a little self interest.

Monday, June 15, 2009

The cleansing fire awaits

Let's say you have a Pontiac Sunfire. You are the envy of every white-trash, meth addicted teenage girl in the trailer park. The problem is that the girls want your fly ride but don't want to ride on your fly. If only you had something that the girls really want...like money. Well nothing says "money to burn" better than a Italian exotic ride like a Lamborghini.

Things we take for granted #1

I wasn't going to comment about the current shit pile that is Iran but I felt compelled to link to this story. It looks like "voting" in Iran is more of a act of pacifying the masses than a meaningful determination of leadership.

Voting is #1 on my list of things that the average American takes for granted. Next time some idiot starts bitching about fixed elections in this country I'm going to knock them on their ass.

Good advice

The Internet is the best place to get quality, unbiased advice. There are literally millions of experts standing by on the Internet waiting to help those with even the most complex questions.


Friday, June 12, 2009

Best Porn Search Ever

Microsoft's new search engine Bing is a total breeze for getting your pr0n fix. It's no secret that Google makes it really easy to see pictures of naked ladies and such but Bing takes it a step further. Go to the Bing video search, search for something like "porn" and then turn off the "safe search" option. What you get is a page full of thumbnails that when you place your mouse pointer over them...they start playing. This means that you can watch these porn video thumbnails without having to go the actual pop-up covered and spyware laden porn website.

You're welcome!

Sensitive ponytail man

Stick to community theater and Philip Glass concerts there douchebag.

Hard to believe

Someone asked me how Ford as come through the collapse of the US auto industry relatively unscathed, at least so far. Let's see how about this....

  • Brand consistency - Ford hasn't launched a a new "brand" since 1985's Merkur disaster. They were wise enough to kill that abortion in just four short years. New brands do nothing but increase production complexity, marketing cost and dillute your other brands.
  • Global Operations - Ford has sold all around the world and always under the Ford name plate (hear that GM/Vauxhall/Opel or whoever you are this week). They also designed and built cars specifically for those markets instead of trying to repackage the same shit.
  • Innovate through acquisition - Ford started the boutique brand wars in 1989 when it snapped up famed English sports car maker Aston Martin. Twenty years later Ford has divested nearly all (Volvo still remains but is for sale) of those boutique brands BUT they gained years of invaluable technical, engineering, safety and performance experience by owning those companies. Ford would "enhance" these companies but would not dillute their product, leaving most of the character of those cars as they should be. Take Saab as an example of what GM did...it's just a Subaru/Saturn/Vauxhall with a fancy interior. All of the Saab character was beat out of the car by GM's obsession with shared platforms and "badge engineering".
  • Good timing - Ford may have lost money selling Jag and Land Rover but if they hadn't sold them when they did they would have been stuck with them like anchors (like GM is with Saab).
So the result is that Ford can bring out new products when most of its rivals are struggling to survive. Look at the new Taurus SHO, I know what you're thinking but just keep an open mind. This thing looks great has an awesome engine and is set to include features like heated/cooled/massaging seats....just like the German sedans that cost $10K-$20K more.

Only problem is that you have to tell people you drive a Taurus....may be worth it.

Thursday, June 11, 2009


Revision3 has a new show about making special effects called Film Riot. These guys are seriously funny and the show has some really cool stuff.

Coming soon.

Is Leonardo DiCaprio the Robert Dinero of our generation? I always thought he was a great actor but he blew me away in Blood Diamond and The Departed. He and Scorsese have teamed up again for Shutter Island.....looks awesome.

Glenn Beck, Douchebag Extraordinaire

Read this.

Are you serious? A crazed racist goes on a rampage and you blame it on politics? FUCK YOU GLENN BECK.

Here's some more commentary on this, drawing parallels to the early 90's when "right wing" asshats started groups like the Michigan Militia. Why is it that when a bunch of "right wing" people get together it's all about guns, jesus and overthrowing the oppressive rule of the Federal Government? When "left wing" hippies get together it's usually about smoking pot, fucking and listening to music. Which party would you rather crash?

I've got wood.

Microsoft's awesome Project Natale made a appearance last night on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon....it's amazing.

One problem, I hope those goofy red jumpsuits aren't going to be required for Natale....that would suck.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Skynet is here

This video has a little bit of everything. High quality 3D animations of future combat robots and video of the current technology in action....with a little bit of future humanoid warriors thrown in.

Kill Whitey!!

Wow....someone needs to attend a couple of diversity training courses.


Here is a really cool animation of the construction of the International Space Station over the last 11 years.

Oh man...

This Onion News story had me in tears. First, its is the funniest god damn thing I've seen today. Second, I'm so pissed that digital cameras and high resolution camera phones didn't exist when I was in college.

Police Slog Through 40,000 Insipid Party Pics To Find Cause Of Dorm Fire


This video is seriously twisted....and funny as hell!!


Tuesday, June 9, 2009

They were right!

Palin, Gingrich, Romney, 2012.

Maybe the Mayans were right and 2012 will be the year of the apocalypse.

At this point I think Obama would have to shit on a picture of Abraham Lincoln and wipe his ass with an American Flag to loose in 2012 but....stranger things.

Space creeps

Event Horizon was one of my all time favorite horror movies. If you've never seen it then you should really check it out. There is a new movie coming soon called Pandorum which looks like it could be very good and very much like Event Horizon.

Space Lamb

Just because you have a Mac and PhotoShop doesn't make you an advertising genius.

NSFW to the max.

Usually I avoid the overt and obvious porn stuff just because I want to keep my blog at least Manson Family-friendly. But this morning I saw this and it's so beyond fucked up that I can't NOT link to it. It is, without doubt, the most bizarre fetish porn video I have ever seen....and that's saying something. Needless to say, it's Japanese.

NSFW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....make sure you watch the last 45 seconds if nothing at all. And turn down your volume.


Futurama is officially back! Comedy Central has ordered 13 brand new episodes of the series proving that great TV doesn't always have to die.


Monday, June 8, 2009

Good thinking!

The State of Indiana has successfully delayed Chrysler from exiting Bankruptcy court. They took their issue all the way to the US Supreme Court in order to try an reclaim a larger portion of the money they stand to loose. What's at stake? The State has 43 million dollars invested in Chrysler which they stand to recover at a substantial loss (only $.26 on the dollar.)

Now I applaud the State for trying to get back a larger portion of the money at stake but Chrysler is, at present, loosing $100 million dollars per day due to the bankruptcy proceedings. Add to that the fact that there are THOUSANDS of idled Chrysler employees in Indiana that are facing financial disaster you have to wonder it is really a smart move. I'm sure all those employees are happy to know that their elected officials are just trying to piss off what's left of Chrysler.

Stage FAIL!

This is the biggest hit Brett Michaels has had in at least two decades.

You are going to do what?

What do you give the person that has everything? I give you INTRconjunctival jewelery. What's that you ask? That would be tiny pieces of jewelry inserted INTO YOUR FUCKING EYEBALL!

Good luck watching the video without squirming out or your chair.

Now that hurts.

Is GM the new Amtrack? I think using Amtrack as a comparison is completely fair and scary as hell.

Why are you still talking?

Newt Gingrich...there's a guy who's out lived his relevance. You know things are bad when the GOP has to trot that dead horse around to try and appease their radical right "base". Check this great news story about a recent speech Gingrich gave about American citizenship is ordained by god....how's that for megalomaniacal self-importance. My Democracy is better than yours because my imaginary deity says so!!

All you Christians better watch out, gay rights and abortion are going to destroy the fabric of space and time!

Friday, June 5, 2009

Nice Try!

I see your Facebook invitation and I raise you a giant fuck off!!! IT'S A CULT!!!

You'll all be dead on bunk beds wearing cheapo running shoes before the decade is out. MARK MY WORDS!!!!!

You'll all be building Mark Zuckerberg's pyramid/resurrection machine....slaves!!


Pixar FTW!

Pixar Studios have been hugely, massively successful over the last few years. Think about the movies they've made; Toy Story, Cars, Finding Nemo just to name a few.

Check out this page for some truly amazing numbers showing just how much money Pixar makes.

Jesus Mother Humping Christ

Have you seen Microsoft's big announcement from E3 this year? It's called Project Natal and it makes the Wii's stick waving bullshit look like a joke. Here's the coolest of the videos but there are more out there that you should watch.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Tackled by the crazy Jesus.

Getting arrested is the last thing this guy should be worried about....never underestimate the power of crazy. Crazy can make 90 pound little white girls kick in windshields and shit.

Fierce Whisper

I love the Internet. Make sure you watch the last 30 seconds.......WTF!!!!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009


Hummers are awful. The Hummer brand may represent absolute epitome of GM loosing it's way. The only thing worse than the actual Hummer vehicles are the swarthy douchebags that drive them.....you know the ones with the dominant brows and hairy knuckles that usually have a "rebel" flag somewhere on their person.

Well now every time you see John Q. Redneck you can point and laugh (even harder than usual) because now he's sporting the latest in Chinese Automotive wonder. That's right, Hummer is now owned by some no-name Chinese industrial complex.

Every new Hummer now comes with it's very own little red book!

Wind/Douche bag.

I guess I'm a liberal now...but I still refuse to agree with everything that Michael Moore says and thinks. Here's his blog post about GM's bankruptcy.

The first part is what I like about Moore. He's insightful and knows the history of General Motors better than most people (Roger & Me is still the only one of his movies that I really liked). The second part is where his windbag button gets stuck to the "hurricane" setting.

Public Transportation will never work in this country, forcing people to sit on a cramped bus next to fat ass mouth breathers is the fastest way to kill that person's environmental concern. Our entire country was built around the automobile both physically and culturally. Public transportation IS NOT A VIABLE REPLACEMENT for the car. And who the fuck wants to sit on a "high speed" train for a 17 hour trip from LA to New York when a plane can make that trip in half the time? Trains work in Europe and Japan because of the short distances involved...that doesn't translate well to a country the size of the United States.


This guy carries his balls around in a bowling bag.

Know your news?

How well do you know your current events? Check out the PewNEWS IQ test.


In light of GM's bankruptcy, S&P is de-listing the (former) auto giant from it's S&P 500 index of stocks. The REALLY sad thing is that they are being replaced by DeVry......ouch.

Monday, June 1, 2009

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