Tuesday, September 30, 2008

It's out there

NASA has had some stunning successes in unmanned missions over the last decade and Phoenix has been no exception. The Phoenix lander recently recorded images of snow falling over the Mars polar landscape. Pretty amazing when you think about it.

Too bad Bush's half-hearted effort to refocus NASA's efforts towards a return to the Moon have been a dismal failure. The next administration, McCain or Obama, is most likely going to have to give NASA the shaft on funding in light of our current economic climate. Oh well, maybe the Chinese will have the spare change to take along an American when they go.

Losers

I was thinking about something other than the financial markets today. What the hell has happened to all the Democrats that lost out to Bush? When was the last time you heard anything from John Kerry or Al Gore? Other than the convention stuff (and John Edwards little escapade) they have been conspicuously absent from this campaign. If I were either of those guys I'd be shouting as loud as possible about how bad the Bush administration has fucked things up. Just seems odd....you don't even see much mention of the Clintons these days. I mean Hillary is still a Senator right? Where is her commentary on this whole bailout mess, I haven't heard a peep.

Bigger fish to fry I guess.

Word of the day

It's really more of a saying, anyway today's saying is: Dead cat bounce.

You're in big trouble

Little Sarah got in trouble with Principal Couric so Daddy had to come and have a little sit down.



Are you fucking serious? First, they wouldn't let her talk to anyone. Then once they did she looked like a total loon on national television. Now she can't even be trusted to be interviewed without McCain sitting RIGHT FUCKING NEXT TO HER? She's so dim that in order to know what she has to agree with he has to be right their to spin the bullshit that is coming out of her mouth as it happens.

Free advice

Here's a great article about our current financial mess. It's no wonder that Bush/Paulson wanted to shove this bailout through as rapidly as possible...it was never a good idea, it was just away to keep all the balls in the air a bit longer. They fueled the economy by building houses and selling them to people that could not afford them, now there is a gross oversupply of houses that no one can afford dragging down the entire economy.

Some people have been screaming that Congress should give that $700 billion to people to help pay mortgages that they can no longer afford (even if they never should have been able to get in the mortgage in the first place). This is no better than the Wall Street bailout, you're just throwing the money into a different bottomless hole.

Why not use that money for some modern version of Roosevelt's "New Deal"? Re-Form an organization like the WPA and use it the same way it was used in the 30's and 40's. With $700 billion dollars you could afford to pay every unemployed person in this country $25,000/year for the next three years....and put them back to work in some way. Pay these people to build enough wind farms, solar fields, hydro and geothermal plants to tell the rest of world where they can put their oil.

It may be regarded as Socialism but what would you call the Nationalisation of Financial Institutions? Not exactly the harbinger of Democracy.....

Monday, September 29, 2008

Man that hurts

This made me laugh so hard that I'm pissing blood.

Check please.

Well, looks like it's time for Wall Street's "come to Jesus moment". I'm going home to clean my guns.

Sign of the times

Right now the news is dominated by the 2008 Election and our economic meltdown/government bailout. There was some brief mentions of the Chinese space walk mixed in with the financial doom and gloom. It's sad that most of the major media has completely ignored this story but a private US company, SpaceX, has succeeded in reaching earth orbit with their rocket system. This is the first time that a private enterprise has been able to achieve that goal. This success opens the door for future missions such as launching satellites and potentially having a capsule/passenger system within a few years.

The privatization of space is going to be a big deal in the next decade, it may be the only bright spot for US space exploration. I have no doubt that NASA is going to face serious troubles with Orion both from a technical and a financial perspective. All this debt from the Wall Street bailout is going to effect ALL government budgets and I doubt NASA will get enough funding in the near future to do anything dramatic.

Smile

I hate the Smart ForTwo. I think it's an abomination of everything I love about cars and whenever I see one I laugh at it's smug occupants. If you live in an urban area then the humiliation of being seen in this Hobbit car is justifiable, but I see them on the highway all the time. Driving one of these on the highway is absolute insanity.
/end rant

That being said, what happens when you remove the pathetic 1000cc three cylinder engine and replace it with the four cylinder 1300cc engine from a Suzuki Hayabusa motorcycle? First, you go from 70HP to 180HP. Second, you go from alive to dead after you realize that you've got all the power in the world but with tiny rear drum brakes to try and stop it.

Sounds nice though.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Adorable

The best comedy always happens during an election year.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Cute

I love Sarah Silverman, she's so cute and funny as hell.

NSFW for language. (Buy some fucking headphones)


See more Sarah Silverman videos at Funny or Die

Ferrari Model

Check out this video about an Italian guy that built a PERFECT scale model Ferrari. All the way down to a function 12 cylinder 4 stroke engine with a five speed gearbox.


Most incredible working Ferrari model in the world

Please make her stop.

Please, this has to be some kind of joke. Every time she speaks I close my eyes and cross my fingers. A succinct answer would have been that Israel is it's own country and can make it's own decisions.



Here's some balance. Joe Biden may say things he shouldn't but at least he's speaking his mind and not re-hashing some series of party mantras. Also, he tends to not use simplistic terms like "bad guys" or "evil-doers" and sounds like he actually knows what he's talking about.

I love maps.

Sarah Palin has famously said that her state's proximity to Russia gives her more experience and perspective on dealing with the Russians. This got me thinking about how big a country Russia really is and the fact that the part of Russia nearest to Alaska is mostly an arctic no man's land. So how far away from Moscow* is Palin's home town of Wasilla, Alaska? The answer is 4318 miles.

Barack Obama has called Chicago home for the last several years so for the sake of argument we'll call that home for him. Chicago is 4969 miles away from Moscow.

So 651 miles makes for more experience huh?



*In case you're reading Governor Palin, Moscow is the capital of Russia.

Always Funny

Here's a great interview with John Stewart and Stephen Colbert. It's rare to see an interview where Colbert drops his right wing character and gives some honest commentary so it's certainly worth a read.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Oh my.

This person could be your next President. If she can't keep her composure when asked a relatively benign question by Katie Couric how the hell will she be able to go toe-to-toe with all those "evil-doers" in the world?



And in one uncomfortable moment Sarah Palin is presented to the World. If women in this country think that the men in this country are sexist....then they should really watch this shit.



Of course Palin's people swiftly ushered the press corps out of the room (after less than a minute), they were probably afraid that he was going to propose next.

That makes no sense

I missed this little bit about Sarah Palin. Apparently she had a tanning bed installed, at her own expense, in the Governor's Mansion shortly after taking office. Now that's not so bad, she can do what she wants with her own money, but isn't that the house that she supposedly only spent 85 days in over the 19 months she was in office? She's pretty wasteful with her own money.......

Connections

There's this great TV show called Connections that started in the 70's and resurfaced again in the 90's. If you've never watched the show I suggest you keep an eye out as it still appears in syndication from time to time on channels like TLC. It was hosted by a brilliant Irish science historian named James Burke and was originally produced for the BBC. The premise of the show was that Burke would present a question or and interesting scientific theory and then show how it was interconnected with other discoveries, people and places. It has long been one of my very favorite shows, here's the intro of the very first episode. Rather eerily, the introduction was shot at the now destroyed World Trade Center....

Lighten up!

Here's something to lighten things up this morning. Not sure how I missed this Writer's Strike Conan O'Brien skit but this is hilarious.


Conan O'Brien Plays Rock Band - Funny home videos are a click away

This should be interesting.

The Obama camp says that they intend on being at the debate site and ready to proceed on Friday night.



How cool would it be to see Obama answering questions from the moderator or the audience while standing next to a starkly empty podium where John McCain should be standing. Maybe they'll send Sarah Palin to fill in...lol!

The end?

Did John McCain destroy his own campaign yesterday? Let's review: Obama has said he approached McCain early on Wednesday about working together with Congress to help with the Bail Out Crisis. They spoke and tenetively agreed to make a joint announcement. Here's where things get strange because from that point it seems the McCain campaigne jumped the shark.

  • McCain appears to have completely disregarded the conversation with Obama. He declares that he is suspending his campaign and that Obama should do the same.
  • Obama's campaign says.....WTF bitch, what happened to our "joint" statement.
  • McCain cancels his scheduled appearance on Letterman just hours before he was scheduled to appear. Later during the taping of Letterman's Show, Dave was told that McCain was just down the street being interviewed by Katie Couric....oops.
  • McCain calls on the suspension of first scheduled Presidential Debate this Friday under the guise that our economic crisis should take priority.
  • Obama's Campaign says....WTF? Hold still so I can kick your ass!
Here's Letterman being very eloquent but still totally slamming McCain.



Here's one reason why McCain may be feeling the heat regarding this Banking Crisis.

Boob juice

I admire people that advocate better treatment of animals but I'm not about to stop eating delicious cow flesh. PETA is forever complaining that people need to pay more attention to the plight of animals and then wonders why the general public ignores them. Here's why PETA, you're nuttier than squirrel turds.

Sneaky

Check out this article and accompanying videos about Chrysler's trio of new EV and NEV vehicles. I have to say the more I think about this announcement the more impressed I am, they have really stolen some of the thunder from Chevy's Volt. If Chrysler's claim that a four door Jeep or a six passenger minivan has the same electric only range of the Volt (40 miles) then what does that mean for the Volt? The Volt is basically an overgrown four passenger hatchback, how could it compete with either of the larger Chrysler vehicles? Especially if the Volt is as expensive or MORE expensive than either of the Chrysler cars.

Here's my questions.
  • How close are these models to production? Two of them are based on existing platforms meaning that only the powertrains need to be completely tested in order for them to be road ready. Chrysler should be able to have these on the road well before the Volt.
  • How much more expensive than their ICE only counterparts will these be? That much battery power is not cheap...my guess is that you're talking about a $10,000 price premium over a "standard" minivan or Jeep. Is that too much? At $4/gallon it would take the average driver (driving less than 40 miles per day) about four years to recoup the price difference. That's not taking into account the cost of replacing batteries or declining range, etc. so that may not make either of these worth it unless you factor in the positive environmental aspect and the smug factor....or potential tax deduction.
  • How much heavier will they be? Sure the batteries are low-slung so the weight won't effect handling too badly but adding the weight has to make them slower. Is reducing the size of the ICE cutting enough weight to offset the battery weight?
  • How much for the all-electric Dodge? If you can get that thing on the road for $60-70k then it would put Tesla out of business over night with their $100K+ price tag. Maybe this is why Tesla is working so hard on their next models...they knew this surprise was coming.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

I hope you get your wish

I think that CNN's Campbell Brown has a brain tumor. The McCain Campaign isn't keeping the press away from Sarah Palin because she's a "delicate flower". They're keeping her out of the light of day so she doesn't make herself look like anymore of a total idiot than she already has. Of course that comment was sexist because I called her and idiot right? She's not an idiot because she's a woman, she's and idiot BECAUSE SHE'S A FUCKING IDIOT. They are mutually exclusive!

But please keeping rattling your sexism saber because the sooner we get to see her latest "folksy wisdom" moron attack, the sooner we can write her off. It's not sexism, it's survivalism for McCain.

Freak!

If a guy can play the drums, keyboard and sing simultaneously people call him a genius. But as soon as that same guys straps a pair of cymbals between his legs people call him a freak.

Premeditated?

Interesting story from Daily KOs that is pulling together other articles that suggest the White House and "Senior Advisors" may have been anticipating a bank bail out for weeks to months. Either they are trying to cover their asses by claiming they saw this coming OR they really did see it coming and kept the problem and their plans hidden from everyone else.

But it gets better! The bail out is primarily going to benefit "... investment banks and other banks that have aggressively written down the value of their holdings" according to a high ranking person at Bank of America. That means that Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley stand to benefit the most from this $700 Billion bail out. Hey...where did Henry Paulson work for 20+ years before becoming the Secretary of the Treasury.....oh right! He worked for Goldman Sachs, what a coincidence. And seeing as how he was the CEO of Goldman prior to his tenure at the Treasury Department I'm sure he was VERY familiar with Goldman's market position and exposure.

I guess we just have to trust that Paulson would never have talked to anyone in the Investment Banks (like say the CEO of Goldman Sachs that holds Paulson's old job) and told them to just write down as much of their bad debt as possible and we'll just fool Congress into bailing you out.

Am I the only one that cynical?

Enough

Could someone please find a viable replacement for oil ASAP. I'm tired of seeing this Douchebag and all the other crack pots from oil rich nations getting any attention whats so ever. Once the world oil market crashes the only thing I want to hear out of Ahmadinejad is "What color would you like that carpet in sir?"

Here's my favorite part, "On the Holocaust, he said an impartial group should research whether it happened as has been claimed." Who's impartial about the Holocaust? You either a.) believe it happened and are disgusted by it or b.) deny it happened because you have an acorn for a brain. Of course thousands of American, British, French, Polish and Russian soldiers that liberated Nazi death camps could be lying about what they saw....

Memories....

I ran across some videos this morning on YouTube that are priceless. If you've never seen Fear of a Black Hat then you don't know what you're missing.

Video is NSFW.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Are you stupid or something?

Google's touted "Android" mobile phone platform made it's big splash today in New York. Everyone wants to compare it to the iPhone but it appears that the comparison has already fallen on its face. The first Anroid phone, the G1, is available through T-Mobile but lacks one very important feature....there's no 3.5mm Headphone jack. Who's bright idea was that? You have to use a "dongle" plugged into the device's USB port to use any standard headphones. I think "dongle" is French for "a little piece of plastic that you'll lose five minutes after you take it out of the package."

So let's see what Google needs to do in order for their Android to be better than the iPhone.

  • Come up with a application better than iTunes for hosting apps, buying music and subscribing to podcasts. Sure iTunes is flawed and you can't subscribe to Podcasts directly from your iPhone but it's still pretty good.
  • Add a fucking headphone jack....seriously, WTF?
  • Design a good UI. I hate Apple as much as the next guy but the iPhone's User Interface is awesome...it's what apple does after all.
  • Make it smaller. The G1 is basically an HTC Tilt in terms of form factor. The Tilt feels like a brick in your pocket so I'm guessing the G1 will to.
  • Only 1GB of storage on board. Sure the G1 has infinite expandability via a microSD slot but $179 for only 1GB when Apple gives you 8GB for only $20 more?
  • T-Mobile? Yuck, what am I a tweenager?
Ways the G1 will be better
  • User replaceable battery. Apple still hasn't figured that one out.
  • Physical keyboard. Sure the iPhone's predictive on screen keyboard is good but a physical keyboard will always be better.
  • Open application support. The app store for the iPhone cuts both ways, it's easy to use but restrictive. Google's will be the opposite, harder to use but completely open.
  • Better integration with Google services....debatable

True Story

A few years back (single, college days) I was moving from one apartment to another. Now I was known as somewhat of a slob but at least I kept my mess confined to my own bedroom and it was usually just dirty laundry because I would only do it once a month(ish).

So my mother and my sister were helping me load the enormous pile of dirty laundry on my futon into big hefty bags. A couple of feet down something appeared from within the pile. The object was roughly cylindrical, had an unpleasant odor and appeared to be wrapped in aluminum foil. Once I saw the foil I knew what it was; a La Bamba Super Combination burrito, no beans add rice and sour cream.

Flashback; One night I had returned home very drunk and sat down on my futon/dirty clothes pile to enjoy my delicious burrito. At some point I must have decided it was time to pass out and in that state I stashed the burrito, much like a squirrel, within the laundry pile for later enjoyment. Of course I forgot about the burrito until the moment it was unearthed in front of my mother and sister.....

That was my lowest point in my slob life, but my effort pales in comparison to this pig sty. This is not for the weak of stomach....I warned you.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not responsible for any damage that may result from you watching this video. I'm not sure at this point but the laughter this video caused has resulted in either a ruptured spleen or a dislodged lung.....see you in the emergency room.


http://view.break.com/575834 - Watch more free videos

Fugedaboutit...

Looks like the Yankee's management is like most Yankee fans....a bunch of douchebags.

Come out and play!

Hey it looks like Uncle Cheney is going to let Sarah out of GOP Boot Camp for the day so that she can meet with various "World Leaders". Of course the list of "World Leaders" looks a bit like the guest list at a George Bush Puppet Show but you can't very well have her meeting with someone that may actually be in a position to be critical of her.

The shape of things to come?

Read this story from Wired.com.

The American love affair with the car comes with one really bad side effect, a need for tremendous amounts of oil. Sadly, we just don't have enough oil to satisfy demand. Even worse, our example has proliferated world wide and oil is becoming more scarce every day.

There are lots of acronyms for electric cars these days; NEV, PEV, EV, HEV....but they all equal the same thing. The idea of people replacing their existing gasoline powered cars with some kind of electric powered vehicle. The problem is that existing battery technology cannot support a vehicle flexible enough to replace the easily "rechargable" gasoline powered car. The auto industry's answer so far has been "hybrid" vehicles that feature either gasoline engines or fuel cells that work in conjunction to power the vehicle for distances that can compete with legacy cars.

An alternative to carrying around a heavy gasoline engine (and the fuel) to recharge/power you depleted hybrid vehicle may be to outright replace the thing that makes our existing gasoline powered cars so convenient....the gas station.

Sounds feasible to me, you're simply replacing the commodity involved from gallons to watts.

Left Field

Chrysler has an "advanced" prototype electric vehicle that appears to directly compete with the Tesla? WTF? Where did that shit come from? Better yet, the Chrysler EV is also (like the Tesla) based on a Lotus sourced chassis. I pretty much ignored a story a couple weeks ago that was talking about Chrysler having eight new vehicles on the road by 2011 because it seemed so incredibly impossible. If Chrysler is pursuing partnerships with Nissan and Lotus then maybe that wasn't so far fetched.

So Chrysler moves back a few inches on my deathwatch scale.

Oh BTW, wonder why Tesla and now Chrysler are basing cars on Lotus rolling stock? Lotus is beyond compare in the arena of building super lightweight cars...exactly what you need for extremely economical electric vehicles where weight is the enemy.

Aunt Sarah's Moose Stew

Keith Olbermann, my hero.

Section 8

Here's a great article about the lunacy that is the Bush/Paulson bailout plan.

Let's hope that wiser heads will prevail in Congress (fuck, I can't believe we have to rely on that loose collection of morons) and that this plan will not be implemented as written. I don't care if the Secretary of the Treasury was a saint or my own mother this is WAY too much power for one person to have over the financial system. The mere fact that Wall Street bankers are willing to agree to this kind of oversight scares the shit out of me....things must be really bad. Or maybe they realize that this will help to shield their actions from the Judicial system in the future?

Monday, September 22, 2008

Douche off!

This could be a broadcast worthy sport in New Jersey.

Awesome Commercial

Here's a great commercial featuring elemental chemistry. Water and Potassium always gotta be starting some shit.

Past its prime?

Scary story from Fortune Magazine. Better buy a windmill and a golf cart now.

Better yet....buy guns and plenty of ammo.

Now that is classy

First of all, NSFW.

Here's a video that is giving out important information to women that think their significant others are cheating on them. It seems like it could be a fairly scientific process.

And before you ask, it's real and not some parody.

Really?

What's this, a man with a conscience or something resembling nobility? I don't care how much money he's made or will make in the future, turning down $22 million is impressive.

This story should also add some much needed perspective to the depth of Wall Street's credibility issues with the public. Willumstad had only been CEO of AIG for barely three months and was already entitled to $22 million in compensation.

Could you walk away from $22 million?

Know the face of evil

Watch this fun little clip of the fantastic Sarah Palin.



First of all, I didn't realize that Alaska was the official "Armageddon Bunker" for the Christian faith.....good to know.

Second, that "Bold" pastor that Palin was praising is Thomas Muthee, who sounds like a really great guy.

Who wouldn't want his endorsement?

Leaky Hadron Collider

So the Large Hadron Collider hasn't destroyed the fabric of space and time, but it has sprung a big leak. Hopefully it will be back up to speed soon and help solve our financial markets woes in some kind of apocalyptic fashion.

In the meantime here's a video explaining how the thing actually works....may be NSFW because you might need a nappy after watching it.

No strength

I don't even have the strength to comment on our current economic woes. I'll just pose these simple questions.

  1. Would any other administration (other than Bush Sr) have proposed this kind of sweeping bailout of the financial sector?
  2. Is the Bush/Cheney personality cult's close relationship with big business the real reason that we're going to throw a trillion dollars into their pockets?
  3. This bailout is going to place a disproportionate amount of power within the control of the Treasury Department. The Secretary of the Treasury, an official appointed by the President, will have incredible power over the economy...possibly more than both the President AND The Congress. Is that such a good idea?
  4. Is the market over-valued? If so then isn't this just a way to waste a trillion dollars trying to stave off the inevitable, a market correction downward?
  5. What if this just further emboldens Wall Street and we end up with a collapse twice as big as if the Government not stepped in?
  6. What kind of disastrous shit hole will this country become if McCain gets elected then dies after a year in office leaving Sarah Palin in charge? I bet she appoints that wonderful husband of hers as "First Dude of Treasury" and we'll all end up huddled around fires like Valley fucking Forge.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Glutton for punishment

Looking back I have to say that High School was my least favorite time of my life. I feel sorry for all of those people that used to say "enjoy it while you can because being a grown up is no fun"...their adult lives must be total shit.

Anyway, few would argue that High School is a difficult time for kids what with all the new hair growth and trying to not get your ass kicked by douchebags. So why would you ever make your life MORE difficult by putting on a public display like one of these. I blame the parents, stop lying to your children and tell them they suck before their entire school has to do it for you.

Sarah Palin, a woman's woman.

So you've just been raped. Violated in the most personal and sadistic way, a crime so humiliating that some estimates say less than 40% of victims ever report the crime. Let's say you're a small town Alaska woman that has decided to face the supposed shame of this crime and report it to your local Police Department. The Police Department issues you a "Rape Kit" which is typically serves multiple functions. It's a investigation tool that contains the necessary equipment to gather physical evidence towards solving the crime and prosecuting the violator. Most of these kits also contain the materials necessary to test and treat the victim for any venereal disease that may have been contracted from the rapist. And here's the controversial part (if you live in a hut and sharpen sticks all day)....most of the kits contain a "Morning After Pill" that is used to prevent inception. So after you've gone through this hellish process the Police Officer presents you with a bill to pay for the services they have so kindly rendered you for being physically and psychologically terrorized....that'll be $XXX thank you, drive through.

Why would Sarah Palin, a woman, have such a problem paying for rape kits...you'd think she could relate with the victims just a little bit. You see, that last part of the kit is the part that right-wing religious nuts, i.e. Sarah Palin, have a problem with. They consider "emergency contraception" to be tantamount to murder. That's right, they'd rather see you give carry a rapist's bastard child for nine months than you take a pill that prevents an egg from forming into an ovum.

How's that for single-minded determination, aka blind ignorance? What's next? You can't take that antibiotic because it is just needlessly murdering bacteria before it multiplies.

ESP

Apparently the Internets legions of hackers are even more efficient than I thought. It appears that I wasn't the only one that thought Sarah Palin's Yahoo account was a uber ripe hacking target. Strange that this hasn't hit any "major" news sites yet.

Don't bother trying to get to Wikileaks to read the emails because it looks like they are either getting crushed by the traffic or someone pulled the plug on their site.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Still laughing

Read this great article about Chappelle's Show. Now Dave was a funny guy BEFORE the show but those 2.5 seasons of TV are some of the best shit ever. It's a shame the whole thing imploded and Chappelle swears he'll never do anything like it again. I think he should sign a contract with Comedy Central to do a new season every four or five years. That would kick ass and shouldn't drive him too crazy.

Just like real life

Here's a great Newsweek article about Sarah Palin's falling public approval. It's just like dating a really hot chick...it's great until you realize that she's got a head emptier than a Lehman Brothers account.

Trust us with your money


Now that is prophetic.

BRAINS!!!!!

BRAINS!!!!!!!!! OHM NOM NOM


The truth hurts

Another great article from the Washington Post. These days when I tell people that I used to like John McCain they look at me like I'm shoveling babies into a coal furnace. That article pretty well surmises why John McCain isn't the same guy I would have gladly voted for eight years ago. I guess loosing the nomination to Bush in 2000 and then watching him systematically destroy 224 years of Democratic progress (and shitting on The Constitution) has had a "win at any cost" effect on McCain.

Update:

If I thought for one moment that McCain was only acting like this in order to get to office and then he'd go back to being a "Maverick" then I may have still voted for him. The problem is I'm not going to risk letting Annie Oakley run our country head long into the apocalypse.....and kill all the polar bears....and moose....and Russians....and pro-choice supporters....and evil doers...and well, everyone really.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

BREAK!!!!

Horses can't talk and they lack opposable thumbs. This means that a horse can't tell someone to fuck off or hit them with a stick. Horses have overcome those obstacles and have their own unique way of showing their displeasure.


Angry Horse Fights Back - Watch more free videos

Not advisable

Considering that Sarah Palin is just a simple "Hockey Mom" my guess is that her idea of computer security is making sure no on sees her typing in her password.

So how long do you think it will be before someone hacks into one of these Yahoo email accounts that she uses for skirting the laws regarding disclosure of information? She may think she was so brilliant (more likely a douchebag legal consultant) for coming up with this idea but just because a judiciary probe can't subpoena them doesn't mean that they can't be seen by the world.

I'd say that there's at least a 50% chance that someone will crack into one of these accounts and dump its contents onto the Internet. She's just too juicy a target for some of the more "noble" hacking groups to ignore. Not to mention the fact that if her, her entire staff and family are all using Yahoo accounts for daily communications...that's a lot potential vulnerabilities.

FREE!!

Beagles are the MacGuyver of the dog world.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Perspective 2.0

Did you have a bad day at the office? Could have been worse......


I am a nerd

This is one of the coolest things I have ever seen. Make sure you watch the video of this crazy calculator in action. Sadly, it appears that they are very hard to come by and easily command $1000 on ebay when they come up.

A little help please?

Here's what happens when you make a honest plea for help to your fellow Internet Users. Expect actually helping you to be at least the fourth or fifth priority for the average Internet user.

Afternoon Palin bash

First of all, Sarah Palin's handlers (Oompa-Loompas?) have apparently exaggerated her trip to Iraq last year. Apparently, she didn't actually go into Iraq because she never left Kuwait. Wow....dangerous place.

The funniest thing, I mean saddest thing, is that prior to this trip to Kuwait Sarah Plain never held a U.S. Passport. That means up until last year she had never even left this country, and fucking Canada does not count bitches.

NEVER LEFT THE FUCKING COUNTRY!!!!! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? JOHN MCCAIN, YOU ARE THE BIGGEST DOUCHGBAG ASSHOLE THE PLANET HAS EVER KNOWN. FUCKING PAT BUCHANAN WOULD MAKE A BETTER V.P. THAN THIS INSULAR, POORLY EDUCATED, RIGHT-WING ROBOT OF THE APOCALYPSE!

I go to bed every night praying to science and Charles Darwin that she will finally crack under the strain of all this scrutiny. I may have to go back to worshiping The Sun because I don't think Darwin's got the Juju to cover this one.

Ninja Cat

Ninja Cat has mastered the manipulation of time.

R.I.P.

R.I.P

Richard Wright, one of the founding members of Pink Floyd.

Fundamentaly Unsound

Banks, financial institutions and mortgage lenders have all had to face the music. What is the most basic tenant of lending money? Only lend money to someone that has a high probability of paying that money back. High risk loans (with their massive fees and service charges) were huge cash cows for the last few years spurred on by a government willing to loosen regulations to a point of where our entire financial system is now reeling. Scary to think just how overinflated the market may be by the now collapsing housing boom.

Don't feel sorry for them....they all knew the risks and chose to sink billions of their investors dollars into sub-prime funds. Feel sorry for yourselves because ultimately your tax dollars will be responsible for rebuilding these "industries".

Where's the bottom in this?

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Best yet.

This is, by far, the best article I've read about Sarah Palin thus far. Combine this with that incredibly bad interview with Charles Gibson and you get a pretty accurate picture of who she really is. If it doesn't scare you then I pity you.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Bring your ass!!

Here's Cracked.com's list of the six most deadly martial arts disciplines from around the world. Maybe you should think twice before you fuck with some little Asian kid with a couple of sticks.

Are you looking at me?

Ah...The Onion.


McCain Vows To Replace Secret Service With His Own Bare Fists

Is this repetitive?

Gina Gershon is Sarah Palin....gotta love parody, the sincerest form of callest someone a total douchebag.


See more Gina Gershon videos at Funny or Die

It's too hard!

Make sure you get your whole head in front of the shotgun....thank you for calling.

Seriously?

Duck and cover....evade the question at all costs.




She makes my skin crawl. Do you think she's a publicity stunt? Maybe the McCain campaign has marched her out there to drum up public support and interest for him with no intention of actually leaving her on the ticket. I wish that were true but it appears that there are people that actually believe this vindictive and seemingly rude person should be one heartbeat away from the Presidency.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

MATT DAMON!!!!!

This is fucking priceless! Matt Damon just got a huge gold star from me.



Sarah Palin stars in Disney's Snow Dogs 2 - The Mush for the White House....this is the best I could come up with since I don't have a copy of Photoshop here.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

LOL!!!

Large Hadron Collider + Nigerian money scam = Epic LOL!

Bow down!!

Watch this concise piece of misdirection, oops....I mean journalism. Caught in a re-hash of your own bullshit, blame it on someone else.



I guess Bill O'Reilly must be moonlighting as the Palin's Nanny. How else could he possibly pass judgment that the Palins are "better" parents, maybe he's just buying his own bullshit. Maybe next week he'll trying a different angle a try to determine which was the bigger slut, Bristol Palin or Jamie Lynn Spears. That would be equally as classy.

Meta!!!!!

Talk about cheating natural selection.


Car Vs Train by Crazy Driver - More amazing video clips are a click away

Bad ass electrical fire!

Time for a Break.

Hopefully this dog got a nice fat sirloin for dinner that night.


Guard Dog Surprises Robber - Watch more free videos

If you have ever done or think this is in anyway productive you might want to seek professional help.


Hippies Wail for Dead Trees - Watch more free videos

Feel different?

Has the world ended yet? The Large Hadron Collider went online today and thus far has not brought about the destruction of our universe. Of course the day is still young!

Is this a joke?

Did McCain's people really check up well enough on Sarah Palin? I mean shit like this keeps floating to the surface, this bitch has a whole cemetery of skeletons in her closet.

It begs the question, did the McCain camp do their homework or is this some sort of strategy on their part? She is getting a ton of media attention...any publicity is good publicity right? She certainly has stolen the media's focus from Barack Obama.

Whatever the case....Palin is the poison pill for me.

Coolest Guy Ever

Check out this guy getting a hand job on National Television.



I hope her mom doesn't have the Internet.

The face of the future?

Is this the production Chevrolet Volt revealed at last?



It's not bad, its obviously derived from Chevrolet's current "Design Language" and shows a strong resemblance to the Malibu and Impala but still has its own character. Let's just hope the interior is as good or better than the Malibu's.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Training wheels

So why the hell haven't you seen a super exclusive sit-down interview of Sarah Palin by one of the media's "Superstar" interviewers? Here's what the McCain camp has to say about that.

The truth is that she's too busy at the Republican Indoctrination Day-Camp to grant any interviews. She's already proved that while she may be a pitbull with lipstick, she is a total media rookie and needs some serious programming. It's worked miracles on John McCain's public persona, look at how much different he is now versus just two or three years ago. I'm guessing that camp is being run by Dick Cheney and Ronald Reagan's recently unfrozen, reanimated brain.

This is the best daily show segment since the infamous "Series of Tubes" video.

Who ya gonna call?

Ghostbusters 3 is apparently in the works and will feature the original cast.


Awesome.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Be careful

If you watch this, I'm not responsible for your actions. Also, I will NOT post bail for you either.

Doorstop

The funniest thing that I've seen all day. Doorstop.....lol.

Be very afraid!!

Fear remains the greatest tool of the Republican Party. They're catching a lot of flack (rightfully so) for showing a video about terrorism at their Convention yesterday. I think Keith Olberman made the best comment about that, here's the video and Olberman's comments are at 4:26 if you want to fast forward through the plucking of heart strings....

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Doesn't matter if you're white or white

Here's an article from the Washington Post website about the very apparent lack of diversity at the RNC. I find this interesting because while watching Palin speak I actually noticed that the entire audience appeared to be white. So we started counting how many non-white people we could see in the crowd. During a 45 minute speech we counted no more than 15 non-white faces in the crowd and some of those may have been duplicates. That's pretty sad.

Morning bash.

What morning wouldn't be complete without some Sarah Palin bashing.

According to this fluffy story, Sarah Palin is loved by her small Alaska hometown. Of course the CNN article fails to mention that when Palin was the Mayor of that small town she threatened to fire the local librarian for not removing books that Palin considered "obscene". Not every resident of that small Alaska town has forgotten that episode and some have paid a great deal of attention to Palin's subsequent actions as Mayor and Governor. This rather well written email comes from one such lost member of Sarah Palin's flock and details the last 10-12 years of Palin's political career.

That is, without doubt, the most honest and factual accounting of Sarah Palin that I have see thus far.


Then there is her speech last night at the RNC. It wasn't bad, she's well spoken and fairly articulate. But she has a very unflattering demeanor...a kind of angry, confrontational style that I don't particularly care for. The idea that this seemingly bitter and acerbic person could be face of America to the rest of the world is frightening. Also, the whole tone of the RNC seems to be angry as compared to the rather light and hopeful tone that was the theme of the DNC last week. It's almost as if the Republicans are acting like angry, caged animals with the anticipation of a loss in November.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Let's be free!

Every American has greatly benefited from the increase in both awareness of crash safety and the regulations forced upon US Automakers. The establishment of crash and safety testing has made a HUGE impact (no pun intended) on traffic fatalities. There was a time that the Europeans looked down on the US safety standards and insisted that their manufacturers were responsible enough to not be policed in such a way. The Europeans finally saw the light and introduced the EuroNCAP testing program to provide consumers with a thorough evaluation of how cars behave in an accident. There are many people that claim the latest EuroNCAP series of tests are even more thorough than those enforced by the NHTSA in the United States.

Because the US Government forces companies to comply to NHTSA standards it makes it very expensive for European manufacturers to sell some of their most popular cars in the US. Not because those cars are unsafe, many of them are VERY successful in the EuroNCAP tests, but because there is a huge cost associated with engineering and testing those cars for both standards. GM Chairman Bob Lutz is pushing for the US Government to recognize the EuroNCAP ratings as an acceptable equivalent to those of the NHTSA.

That would allow global automakers like Ford and GM a much easier road to manufacturing and selling the same cars in both the US and European market. Although the emissions regualtions are different and would still require completely different engines for each market, it's a lot easier to swap the engines on a manufacturing line versus engineering a completely different vehicle for each market.

Physician, heal thyself!

Now, I don't want anyone to think that I'm obsessed or anything but this is yet another Sarah Palin post. I guess she's just dominating the news so much that it is unavoidable, at least that's my excuse.

Apparently, in addition to believing that women should not have the right to an abortion she also doesn't believe in providing government assistance for pregnant teenagers. Given her daughter's current situation I think I'd call that Karma. Also, that same organization provides "young mothers a place to live with their babies for up to eighteen months" which is also ironic since Palin herself has (supposedly) an infant that isn't even five months old now. But she doesn't seem to be to interested in spending any time with that child if she's willing to spend the next three months campaigning...

Stop mocking me.

I was searching for more fodder for my Sarah Palin mocking when I came across the video of her when she was a sportscaster for an Alaska TV station. Two things strike me about this video, the first is the obvious 80's hair and makeup....wow. The second is a treat for my friends and one of those bizarre coincidences that surprised me, you'll just have to watch (fast forward to :34 seconds in.)

Petty

Did you catch that McCain refused to appear on Larry King Live last night? The McCain campaign did this to "punish" CNN after on of their anchors made a McCain campaign stooge look like a total moron on live television.



Apparently the McCain camp is so upset about the media scrutiny of Sarah Palin that they have even threatened to withdraw from the three scheduled debates with Obama. Let's not forget the real reason is because McCain's people know he'll look like a blundering old man if he has to debate Obama. Forget about a McCain-Obama debate, I want to see Joe Biden make Sarah Palin squirm on live television....talk about sending lambs to slaughter.

Star Whores

Here's the NSFW trailer for Kevin Smith's new movie, Zack and Miri Make A Porno.


Reality check.

This story on CNN highlights the incredible ignorance of the "Religious Right".  Fucking idiots...applauding the Palin family for having the moral fortitude to support their teenage daughters decision to have her child.  

First of all, is anyone out their delusional enough to think that this girl had any say in the matter what so ever?  My greatest hope is that she got pregnant intentionally to fuck with her mother's political career.

Second, still believe abstinance is a viable solution to teenage pregnancy?  I can't wait to hear the word "abstinance" pass through Sarah Palins lips....

Third, Conservative Christian groups are seriously going to use the child of a couple that made at least $200,000 last year as an example of the best solution for teenage pregnancy?  That should be an inspiration to all the poor pregnant teenage girls living in the inner city with parents that don't make anything near $200,000.  Oh well, God will provide right?

I'm glad you've created your own reality based on your religion but the rest of us have to live in the real world.


Bling.

So Google dropped a bomb on the Internet yesterday in the form of a new browser called Chrome.  I've been playing with it, in fact I'm using it while I compose this post, and I've developed some early opinions on it.

  • It looks great, very clean and simple user interface.
  • The "start" page is brilliant.  It show your bookmarks and your most frequently visited sites right there where they always should have been.
  • Low memory usage and it's fast.  It's using a ton less memory than Firefox 3 but its not much faster.
  • Incognito Mode!  This mode allows you to browse without the browser caching anything or storing any history of where you've been browsing....in other words, best porn browser ever.
  • It's not quite stable yet, typical Google "beta".
  • I'm not wild about how it handles bookmarks other than the "start" page stuff.
Everyone is freaking out thinking that this going to hurt Firefox's market share of the browser market.  It's good enough and it may very well cost FF some users but it still lacks Firefox's greatest asset...plugins.  I'll use Chrome but without the plugins I use EVERY DAY within Firefox it will only be a novelty.  The real reason Chorme exists is to prepare users for Google's forthcoming "Android" mobile platform.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Number Two

Another celebrity death, they always go in threes you know.


What's your twenty Snowman? The Snowman is watching out for Smokeys in heaven now...

RIP...Jerry Reed.



Here's some fun CB slang that will bring you closer to understanding Smokey and The Bandit. Eventually you MAY work up to watching Convoy...but don't rush it.

Rest in Peace

Farewell to "The Voice", Don LaFontaine.

Who's in charge?

Who's really in charge of making policy for the Republican Party? Is Sarah Palin being forced onto John McCain for his "moderate" stance on things the Republican Party holds near and dear? She is about as right-wing as you can get and has supposedly been chosen to appease the ultra conservative far right side of The Party.

The problem is that she's fucking poison. She's WAY to right wing for even the Republican Party and the only reason she's even in Politics is because of the weird social vacuum that is Alaska. So again I ask, who's really in charge of the Republican Party these days?

The Republicans have spent the last 28 years pushing the whole "trickle down" theory of economic prosperity. The first problem with that is that it appears that once rich people get even richer they are perfectly satisfied sitting at home on a pile of money eating grapes. The second problem is that the in a Democracy power is shared by everyone and not just the people with the money...which may not be true anymore if the past eight years are any indication.

Is McCain really not fit to even be running for President let alone actual hold the office?

What the hell has happened to the Republicans?

Monday, September 1, 2008

I want your baby.

The hits keep on coming with Alaska Governor and McCain VP pick, Sarah Palin. The latest dirt is that her youngest son, Trigg, is really the son of Palin's 17 year old daughter. Oops.

The major media web sites seem to be avoiding this story so maybe there's nothing to it but the information on the web points to a really piss poor attempt by the Palins to cover this up. What does this say about McCain and the ability of his staff to pick a viable VP? This is what you get when you try to pick someone that is "outside of the box".

UPDATE: Just because they are now admitting that the daughter is CURRENTLY pregnant doesn't dismiss the oddities surrounding the mother's supposed pregnancy. Sounds like abstinence hasn't been such an effective method of birth control in this instance....LOL!

Don't make me hit you again.

Apple fans are a lot like battered wives. No matter how many times Apple drinks a quart of Jack Daniels and shoves them down a flight of stairs they are still there in the morning making eggs and crying.

Please don't think I'm making fun of spousal abuse, it's a serious problem, and so is this crazed addiction that people have for over-hyped, sub-standard Apple products. Maybe we should have an intervention for them....no one can help until they admit that they have a problem.
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